#has this been done yet idk but this song's been in my bucky playlist for weeks itching for an edit

[johnslittlespoon]

– i think of you all of the time.

[talk-geek-to-me]

All the ones you didn't do in the last ask!

So I’m finally getting around to doing this. and you fUCKING HATE ME. This is gonna be hella long.  (she asked for all of them)

This is for the WaterColor asks that I posted last night

Zinc White: how are you really feeling today? I’m very tired tbh like all i wanna do today is sleep rn. very tired

Cadmium Yellow: When you think of the word “happy” what's the first thing that comes to mind? ummmmm probably my boyfriend and the very funny moments you and i share

Lemon: What’s your comfort food? Ben and Jerry’s Brownie Batter Core Ice cream. that shit makes me feel better immediately

Hansa Yellow: What’s your guilty pleasure song? honestly idk, but i will tell you the song that I cant get enough of and its All Time Low by Jon Bellion. like i honestly cant get enough of it rn

Yellow Ochre: Name an artist/band whom you just discovered and cant get enough of. right now its the song that I just said in the last ask. but the band? shit ummmmmm, idk but i’ve been listening to anything in my liked playlist from spotify. so it varies

Naples Yellow: where do you feel most at home? uh, i dont really know. I moved to Idaho so i haven’t figured that most yet

Raw Sienna: with whom do you feel most at home? my boyfriend. I miss him so much and I honestly cant wait till i see him next

Golden Ochre: describe the relationship with your closest friend. JESS *insert random thing that im currently screaming about*

Golden Deep: what’s your favorite season? fall, i can wear converse and hoodies and be comfortable

Cadmiun orange: What do you like to do on your days off? i love to do things that have to get done. like today, i did more homework than i thought i was gonna do and cleaned my bathroom. it’s been a good day.

Orange lake: do you have anyone you can turn to when you’re sad? I listen to music and not do my homework, just focus on me

Titans: do you prefer slow mornings or relaxing evenings? tbh i think i prefer slow mornings cause im not a morning person so that gives me time to sleep in

Shaknazaryan Red: are you currently binge watching anything? CRIMINAL MINDS

red ochre; are you more right-brained (creative) or left-brained (analytical)? i think i’m a bit of both

burnt sienna; is there a painting that brings you peace when you look at it? not really theres a picture i really like tho. here’s the link! https://www.pinterest.com/pin/46865652355803785/

english red; what animal do you relate to most? honestly, a raven

vermilion; what’s your favorite accent? british, like tom holland and tom hiddleston british

cadmium red; do you have a “type” when it comes to a significant other? ....jess you know. but for those of you who don’t know, its the bad boy type... seriously, bucky barnes, loki, and according to jess its the dark-haired, chiseled features, built af, don’t worry, she made a point, like all the famous people im attracted to... all contain the same things that my boyfriend contains. my boyfriend is dark haired, chiseled features, thicc 

scarlet; describe your current crush/es. DARK HAIR, CHISELED FEATURES, BAD BOY TYPE BOYFRIEND

ruby; what does your ideal first date look like? honestly, i dont have one

carmine; what does your ideal second date look like? dont have one

madder lake red; would you ever kiss someone (or accept a kiss) on a first date? considering i kissed my boyfriend within the first hour of meeting him, sure

rose; what’s something really positive going on in your life right now? im actually keeping up with school rn and im fairly proud of myself

quinacridone rose; what’s something you’re really looking forward to? sleep

violet rose; what does your dream house look like? windows. so many windows big kitchen, comfortable

violet; is there any place in particular you’d like to settle down? not really, i’d settle down anywhere as long as im with the man i love

blue lake; what would you like to do/accomplish before you settle down? traveling

cobalt blue spectral; what is the most beautiful place you have ever been to? honestly, i havent been there yet

ultramarine; when was the last time you were in a good mood? do you know/remember what sparked it? ummmm, im kinda always in a good mood?

blue; what’s the most recent dream you remember? [redacted] [redacted] [redeacted] [redacted] [redacted]

bright blue; what does your dream family look like? any kids or pets? how many of each? 2 or 3 kids, 2 dogs and hopefully a cat. married to my boyfriend

blue cobalt; do you like your name? would you give yourself a different name if you could? NO it’s too common, its why i prefer people call me meg or megs. i hate my name.

prussian azure; what’s your favorite scent? vanilla

azure blue; what’s your favorite type of tea, if any? lipton pure leaf raspberry tea, and it has to be cold

turquoise blue; if you could start a garden, what would you plant? literally anything that i could water every once in a while and it still be alive

cerulean blue; if you were guaranteed to have a viewership, would you start a youtube vlog? no, my life is really boring

glauconite; describe your body without using any negative adjectives. curves, well built, purple red hair. honestly, im super comfortable with my body

yellow green; picture yourself walking in a field. what do you see & hear in this scenario? ya know that scene in vampire dairies when Damon is comforting Rose as she’s dying? yea it looks like that

green light; are you in a comfortable place in life? if not, what do you think might make it better? im pretty comfortable with it, just wish my boyfriend was with me

green; name three countries you want to visit; do you have any actual plans in place to visit any of them? ready? you’re gonna laugh jess, Romania, Ireland, England

emerald green; do you speak any languages besides english? are there any additional languages you want to learn? so my mom is from Chile, and she’s native in spanish, but im native in english and cant speak a lick of spanish, but i have been doing the duolingo spanish lessons and its like my latina side has woken up, but i cant speak spanish, i can read it and hear it and probably translate it for you

oxide of chromium; what’s your favorite book? Stalking Jack The Ripper by Kerri Maniscalco

olive green; are you currently reading anything? how do you like it so far? no, im too busy with school and work that i dont have time to read anything and its making me sad. but i always have a book in my backpack just incase

mars brown; what’s a movie that always puts a smile on your face/makes you laugh? the first Avengers

burnt umber; what’s something you plan to do before the day is over to take care of yourself? clean my fucking greasy ass face

umber; have you drank enough water today? nope, thank you for reminding me tho

voronezhskaya black; what or who is your go-to outlet for when you need to vent? you, cause you always provide the best advice and make me feel like my emotions matter to you too

sepia; name five things that always make you happy. Superheroes, music, my boyfriend, my friends, and books, etc

indigo; what’s the best/sweetest compliment you have ever received? today, i was sitting in my car ordering my drink from dutch bros and someone told me that they liked my hair even tho he couldnt really see the color of it. But i get a lot of compliments from my boyfriend about my eyes

payne’s gray; describe your aesthetic? shit, uhhhh, superhero murderer? 

black; post a selfie because you are so beautiful! I’m gonna share with you the one that has my boyfriend going crazy 

[mcueveryday]

I Want It That Way

Title: I Want It That Way

Pairing: Bucky x ofc (named)

Word Count: 1567

Warnings: a bit of angst, some fluff.

Song: “I Want It That Way” – Backstreet Boys

 A/N: Hey everyone! This is my entry for @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan Marvel Playlist challenge. I finally got some time off and sat down to write it! I hope you all like it :)

This isn’t part of a series, but it kinda is a sequel to my Thinking of You story, so I do recommend to read that one before this one. This takes place after The Winter Soldier but before Civil War.

A/N 2: Dorogaya: Dear, my love. (idk if this is true, I googled “russian pet names for girlfriend”)

Bucky looked at the picture of the red head he kept in his wallet, her smile bright even when the picture was black and white. He found the picture when he returned to HYDRA one last time before running away. He needed to see if they had stored some of his belongings before torturing him, and to his surprise, they did. He found that picture inside a pocket watch, and he took it. He knew that girl from before, he just couldn’t remember. But he knew that taking the picture might help him remember.

Now, he stood on the roof of his apartment building in Bucharest, the lights of the houses and building illuminating the horizon. He could hear her softly crying from here. And it’s all his fault. He promised himself that he would never hurt her, and he did just that. He tried to get away from her for her own protection, but she was just too stubborn. And after months of her coming to his apartment with baked goods, plums, needing a hand to fix something in her apartment, that little blond woman squirmed her way into his heart.  

Now, some time later, he knew he was in love with Rachel, and he knew she loved him as well, but… could he ever forget Elizabeth? His Lizzy? She was gone, has been for over 10 years now, but for him it feels like just yesterday. He feels like he just lost her, and the cut in his heart felt too recent. Yet, he knew Rachel was the one for him. But he couldn’t commit to the relationship, not when he couldn’t trust himself around her. Not when he still loved his Lizzy.

He spent a lot of time with Rachel. They tried to spend as much time as possible together. They ate dinner together in his apartment or watched movies in hers, but never went out together. He didn’t want to risk being seen together and having her hurt because of him. At first she was fine with it, but she started to feel anxious about it. She knew about Elizabeth. She knew Bucky’s girlfriend died, but she didn’t know when. Bucky hadn’t told her about him being almost 100 years old, or how when he was a prisoner of war and being injected with the Super Soldier serum. He didn’t know when or if he would ever tell her about that part of his life.

Rachel knew he still loved and always will love Elizabeth, she was very aware of that, and she was fine with that. She knew Elizabeth would always hold a place in Bucky’s heart, but will she ever sit next to Elizabeth in there?

Bucky sighed and placed the photo back in his wallet. He remembered everything that had been said back in her apartment not even 20 minutes ago. The way she frowned when he didn’t say what she needed to hear, how he felt when she asked him if he loved her, the way her eyes filled with tears the moment he screamed at her. It was too much.

“Hey, James?” She asked him during dinner. They were both sitting down at her dining room table, each having a plate of pasta. She was looking at him with a sad gleam in her eyes, fork playing with the pasta in her plate.

“Hm?” Bucky replied through a mouthful of pasta, not looking at her.

“I saw this new coffee shop on my way home, it looked really pretty.” She said, eyes set on him. “I was thinking that maybe we could go there someday.”

“No.”

He didn’t turn to look at her, but he could feel her sad eyes on him. He bit his lower lip, pasta forgotten.

“Come on, please? We always stay in, it could be--”

“I said no.” He interrupted her, voice firm.

“Why can’t we go out? Give me one reason.”

Bucky stood up then, chair scratching the floor as he did. He saw her flinch when he did, and he tried to mask the hurt he felt.

“Tell me. Why can’t we go out? Why can’t we be like any other couple out there?”

“You know why.” He mumbled, not looking at her.

“Because of your arm? I don’t care about it, James. I do not care what other people will say or think about it, I just want to have a normal relationship!”

Bucky closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to get himself together.

“It’s not just that…”

“Then tell me! Talk to me!”

He stayed silent, though. He kept his gaze on the floor, fisting his hands on either side of him.

Rachel bit her lower lip, tears pooling in her eyes.

“I’m done.”

Bucky felt his blood run cold. He turned to her so fast his neck hurt, but he didn’t care.

“I’m done, James. I’m in a constant heartache because of this. Am I not good enough for you? Do I embarrass you?” Tears started going down her cheeks, lower lip quivering as she said that.

Bucky wanted to run to her and hold her, tell her that she was more than enough for him, that he was the one who wasn’t enough. But he didn’t. What he said next, he knew didn’t help her feel better.

“Then leave.”

Her eyes went wide. There was silence in the room. The air was so tense then, and he could feel it.

“What?” She whispered.

“Leave. You want a normal relationship? Go get one. I can’t give you that. I’m sorry, but I can’t do it.”

He hated himself for hurting her the way he was. He loved her, he really did, but he can’t give her what she wants, what she needs. He put on his jacket and his cap, walked towards the door, and left.

He could hear her sobbing from outside her apartment. He could hear the heart wrenching sobs leaving her, and he wanted to punch himself.

He took a deep breath as he stood in front of her apartment door. He knew he had to make this right, Rachel was his rock, his strength. She helped him get better, not knowing everything he went through. He was going to tell her everything, and leave it to her if she wanted to take him back or not. If she did, he’d be the happiest man alive and try every day to make her as happy as she makes him. If she didn’t, he’ll respect her and leave her alone.

He knocked three times. He waited, listening to the shuffling coming from the other side of the door. He heard the locks being turned and then, so slowly, she opened the door. She stood in front of him, tears staining her beautiful face, eyes red and puffy.

 “Can we talk? Please?” He asked, voice raspy. She didn’t nod nor shake her head, she simply moved out of the way for him to come in. He sat down on her couch, looking at the floor and nervously playing with his fingers. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t tell her everything. She’d hate him, she’d leave him, she’d--

“What do you want to talk about?”

Her whisper was so low, he almost didn’t hear her. He looked up, she was sitting down on a chair in front of him, arms around herself. He took a deep breath, and he told her everything. He told her about fighting in World War II and being best friends with Captain America. He told her about the train and being captured by HYDRA. Told her about The Winter Soldier, how he now wasn’t part of them anymore, how he was a new man. He told her about not remembering anything from his old life, just remembering glimpses of it. How he’s been running from HYDRA for a couple of years now, everything.

“That’s… that’s why we can’t go out. Because…” He sniffed. He hadn’t realized he’d been crying until then. “Because if we’re seen together, I don’t want to risk them hurting you. Taking you to get to me.”

He, then, took a glimpse at her. She stared at him with wide eyes, her face straight and clearly analyzing the information she just recieved.

“Please say something.” He begged.

Rachel took a deep breath, and then did something that surprised Bucky. She stood up and sat down next to him on the couch.

“I never want to hear you say this is a mistake, Rachel. I love you.”

She squeezed her eyes shut, a lonely tear making its way down her cheek. He was so scared, he knew she was going to leave him and, if he was honest with himself, he knew he wouldn’t be able to make it through without her. He needed her, he loved her. He need her there with him.

“I love you too.” Rachel said, making Bucky look at her with wide eyes, a small smile making its way to his lips. “But, I’m not gonna lie, this scares me.”

“I’ll do everything in my power to keep you safe. I promise.”

She took his hands in hers, squeezing the metal one extra tight. “I know you will, I trust you.”

He smiled and leaned in, pressing his forehead against hers, hands squeezing hers.

“I love you, dorogaya.”

“I love you, too.”

--

taglist:

@yannii04 @thetherianthropydaily,  @jaamesbbarnes

[todokori-kun]

N O 

I did guess that maybe something was wrong with your computer/internet connection but after a few days the ridiculous anxiety started punching me in the gut again like ‘what if it was something I said’ or ‘what if something happened and we never get to talk again’..it seems so silly and overdramatic now but I seriously did think those things for a while LOL that’s why I kept sending messages… I’m really sorry for spamming you OTL

And no, don’t apologize! It’s not like you had any control over that. If anything, I should be sorry for freaking out so much  ^^;;

But anyway, that’s enough angst for now. I’M SO GLAD YOU’RE BACK :D

Seriously though, sometimes I wonder what was going through Steve’s head when he decided to keep that suit back in the first CA movie XD

The trailer is really cool. I actually think we don’t need another one; this 'teaser’ seems to reveal just the right amount of info :) (And Loki’s hair has FINALLY stopped looking greasy. I think. I hate greasy stuff (unless it’s food) so that hair was really, REALLY bothering me during Avengers 1 and Thor 2, though I guess it did make sense for his hair to look like that at the time)

I think Marvel’s using the 'Power of Love’ thing to explain Nat being able to calm Bruce down. Doesn’t really make that much sense but I agree, it’s cute :3 I shipped Nat with Clint during the first movie (and the reveal that Clint is MARRIED was a serious 'WTH��� moment) but Bruce/Natasha is good enough that I’m not particularly salty over Mrs. Barton.

Sharon Carter/Steve may be the only ship in the MCU that I genuinely dislike. Civil War would have been perfectly fine without it. Sharon and Steve themselves would have been perfectly fine without it. PEGGY would certainly have been fine without it. Just. Why.

Ah, yeah. TDW both gave me hope for Loki and made me lose a little bit of it at the same time, if that makes sense? The thing with Odin worries me, but since I think I read somewhere that Anthony Hopkins is going to be in Ragnarok I guess he’s not dead, so maybe Loki didn’t do anything TOO drastic…

But we got some genuine emotion from Loki over Frigga and I believe that he WAS getting a bit emotional during his 'death’ scene wih Thor, so that’s something, I guess.

To me, Thor 2 proved that while Loki’s morality might have changed, it hasn’t changed for the better, and he still has way too many issues to work through, but his relationship with Thor isn’t quite ruined yet.

I have a soft spot for The Winter Soldier because it was not only the first MCU movie I ever watched, it was the first superhero movie AND the first 'gritty’ live-action movie I ever watched (I was like nine or ten when it came out and before that the only live-action movies I watched were stuff like The Sound of Music and Cats). I guess I get why you might not like it, though- the only reason I still watch TWS now is because I love Bucky’s Winter Soldier costume (sure, we get to see it in Civil War as well but it just looks really cool in TWS) and because it has some of the best Steve & Bucky moments.

(Also Natasha. Natasha is always a good reason.)

YES. Join me in Remember This Cold hell. The creator even has a blog where they answer questions about the series and write shorter stories connected to it :D Also, spoiler regarding the Steve/Loki relationship-

Steve proposed a few stories ago. I’m sure you can guess Loki’s answer.

Awww, thanks! <3 I’m really glad you enjoyed the playlists ^^ but which songs were the ones you didn’t know? And how did you react to Kanae’s list? :)

(And if it’s not too much, could I also ask which songs you thought were the most fitting? it’s fine if you don’t answer this one though)

Ugh, those weird bots ;-;

Random thing, but I got my nails done for the first time today! :) My little sister really wanted to get her nails painted and mom suggested that I should too…normally I don’t really enjoy dressing up and 'decorating’ myself but I thought it would be fun so I tagged along.

I lowkey wanted black nails because Kaneki and Sebastian LOL but I ended up with sky blue. It does look nice so I’m happy with how it turned out :) though the skin right beneath my right thumbnail still hurts…I got my cuticles cut, the cut was too deep and it wouldn’t stop bleeding for a while ;-;

Last note:

Another random thing, but do you have any OCs? :3 It’s my dream to become a writer someday so I have a ton of them, one cast for a book I’m trying to write and another one for a comic I’d make if I was better at anatomy and knew how to do digital art ;-; maybe someday it’ll work out. If it doesn’t, I’ll just write down that story too… I also have lots and lots of discarded OCs for my fandoms (not all of them are discarded though, there’s one wallflower cutie named Naomi for TG and unfortunately I like torturing her a bit too much to let her go. There’s also her brother Tatsuo, a fabulous jerk who loves his little sister very much, in his own passive-aggressive way, and will serve any poor soul who dares to approach her for dinner).

If you have OCs too maybe we could rant about them together? :) (totally not using this as an excuse to ramble about my babies who I love to hurt. I think I’ve caught the Ishida-virus)

Again, don’t apologize! I’m just really glad you’re back, Queen Luna <3333

Don’t worry, I got this message ^^ (Un)fortunately, I’m that person who’d probably tell someone if they’re annoying me. And you’re not annoying at all! I enjoy talking to you a lot, since you’re one of the rare people who shares so many fandoms with me ^^ So if I don’t answer, it means the internet/phone/computer is acting up, ok? I wouldn’t disappear just like that ^^

I’m glad to be back ^^

Before I forget, the new chapter of TG. The title sure is fitting. ISHIDA’S BACK AT IT AGAIN! ((I mean, who names a chapter ‘suffering’))

Maybe he wanted everyone to look at the behind ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) You never know what kind of weird things he likes. It’s so awkward trying to avoid all the key words for those blogs XD

Ahahahah, he did look like needed to wash it… But it’s solved now ^^ And it’s curly. THE ONLY THING THAT’S NOT SOLVED IS THORS HAIR AAAAAAAAAAAA Why did they cut off his glorious locks ;-;

Nat and Clint did seem like a good ship, but since I watched Ultron before anything, I knew about Clint’s situation. It was a bit weird watching Clint and Nat interact, though, since they do seem very close, and not in a purely platonic way.

Since I haven’t reached Civil War yet, I haven’t seen the ship. Somehow, I know I won’t like it ^^ (I mean, from what you’ve said, it really is a very NO ship.)

TDW Loki for me was the biggest ‘honestly, what was I expecting?’ character in the whole MCU universe, because, honestly, what was I expecting? When he ‘died’ I laughed, because he’s Loki and it’s probably another one of his plans. anD I WAS RIGHT.

Frigga is the only character who Loki showed genuine affection for, though, isn’t she? I mean, since we don’t know her well as a character, I didn’t feel anything when she died, but I did feel sorry for Loki.

I recently found a mythology book that features Nordic mythology. And you have 3 guesses about who the main bad guy is in all of them. I’ll be genuinely disappointed if you need the other 2.

One’s about the making of Thor’s hammer where Loki turns into a fly and stings the blacksmith, causing him to mess up the length of the part where you hold it (I forgot the english name), the other one is about him being responsible for the death of Frigga’s son, because he made someone stab the son with mistletoe.  Mythology is weird.

That’s actually adorable ^^ I never would’ve guessed your first action movie was Winter Soldier!  And I completely agree, Bucky’s costume is quite nice (huehuehuehuheue)

I’m scared of starting to read it….. I THINK I MIGHT WAIT UNTIL I FINISH WATCHING CIVIL WAR JUST BECAUSE :))))

Let’s see… I knew the whole Loki&Thor playlist, All of Loki except for Castle, She keeps me warm from Yumikuri I didn’t know, knew all of Urie/Saiko and Urie and I will not say anything about Kanae :))))

Sweet! I only got my nails done once in my life and that was for my uncle’s wedding. I understand your pain entirely ;-; There’s a reason why I only had them done ONCE hahah For some reason, I associated sky blue with you even before this… Idk why, though

Did someone say…. OCs? You want the older ones (absolute Mary Sues, I laugh about them today, even though I was 100% serious before) or the newer ones (the ones with actual flaws and development?) Also, we probably talked about this before, but have you watched Fullmetal Alchemist? My biggest Mary Sue is from there ^^;;

ALSO ALSO, I was thinking about changing my icon, and I narrowed it down to 4 potential ones. Which one should I choose?